My Body, As It Is

Soft and strong together, just as I am

🎧 Listen to the Demo

Soft and strong, just like the boots that carried me here. This demo is the sound of survival — a glittergrit anthem reclaiming every scar and curve. Turn it up.

🎥 Watch the Video Collage

Filmed throughout Saint Pete and cut like memory — this vertical video is a fast-cut queer body collage, full of motion, mood, and presence.
Watch on YouTube

📝 Want to know the full story behind the video?

Read the blog post →

💬 Written for the version of me who prayed to be a girl just to survive — and for every queer body still learning how to feel like home.

Lyrics

[Verse 1]
I prayed to be a cheer queen under Friday night lights
Crowd yelled “fag,” “queer,” tried dimming my tights
I kicked their hate back, spun fear into flair
Spark in my chest set the field on fire—beware

[Pre-Chorus]
They called me wrong, tried to clip my wings
But every bruise turned bright—watch this phoenix sing

[Chorus]
My body is real, my body is mine
Every curve, every scar, by design divine

[Verse 2]
I wanted a body like Chyna, that was my goal
Now I channel Rhea Ripley, chasing my own gold
One bright awakening showed me who I am
Soft and strong together—here I stand

[Pre-Chorus]
They said I’d break, but my backbone sings
Each fearless step shakes the stadium rings

[Chorus]
My body is real, my body is mine
Every curve, every scar, perfect by design

[Bridge / Breakdown]
Moles and holes, wrinkles and lines
Stars with scars, our bodies shine
Every fold, every mark—this is me
Owning my story, living free

[Chorus]
My body is real, my body is mine
Every curve, every scar, perfect by design

[Outro]
This body, as it is—forever free

Young Adam in a blue shirt standing next to mom and two brothers in Cub Scout uniforms. He stands with hip dropped and head slightly tilted, expressing early femme energy before it was shut down.

Before I was told to butch up — before I joined Cub Scouts because I liked the arts and crafts — this was little femme me with my hip popped and softness intact. I joined for the clay hand sculpture. I stayed for the performance.

Young Adam in a custom white cheerleading shirt and blue shorts, standing in front of a school portrait backdrop, smiling proudly in a pose made with intention and grit.

The school wouldn’t pay for a boy cheerleader uniform, so my mom made it happen. This is me, proud and performing — in handmade shorts, standing strong in a pose I thought would make me belong. I still carry that energy, but now it’s fully mine.

Behind the song

I wrote this song to reclaim every bruise and curve as proof of my story — not shame I had to fix, but beauty I already held.

I remember my first prayer: I asked God to make me a girl, because I thought life would be easier. I was soft and dreamy and already thinking in story arcs — turning little moments into something cinematic in my head, because those were the moments that mattered.

I prayed to be a cheer queen under Friday night lights, but instead I got heckled in tights and told to fear my softness. Every mole, every scar, every stretch of skin I used to hide has now become part of my phoenix rise.

At first, I chased someone else’s idea of “strong” — like Chyna from WWE. But now I shine in my own form of power: soft and solid, fierce and femme. Rhea Ripley mirrored something back to me I already knew — that softness and strength are not opposites. They’re sisters. They’re me.

And I didn’t do this alone. I’m here because of the cheer moms who had my back — like Holly and Shaundi’s moms — and the trans and nonbinary friends who’ve shared their own body stories and helped me feel less alone. Thank you to Devika, Andy, and Crafty.

I may be a cis man, but I still don’t always feel right in my body. That’s real. But for the first time, I’m starting to. This song is me owning it.

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